One Square At A Time

Have you ever found yourself between a rock and a hard place?  That’s where I’ve been lately.  I’ve been having trouble finding work.  Life has basically been sucking.  For a long time I was operating in what my sister calls crisis mode.  I’ve been focusing so hard on finding work that I had tunnel vision.  I kept hitting a wall in my job hunt. So now I’ve decided that instead of just finding a job I should take a step back and think about what I really want to do. 

In the midst of all of this I began playing chess with some friends.  It became a way to take my mind off of my problems for one night a week and have fun. Last week I learned something new about chess.  I discovered that the reason I keep losing is because I keep trying to get all of pieces out to the middle of the board and capture as many of my opponent’s pieces as I can and try too hard to win.  Last week I played with Jeremy and he showed me how I could control the center of the board one square at a time.  Once I had control of a few squares I was able to mount a more successful attack and develop a stradegy.   Why  don’t I find other things to do for fun? I wondered. On the advice of my psychologist I decided to get a hobby and live my life.  Since I was having trouble finding work and now that I’ve decided to take a different approach; why not volunteer?  

I searched online for volunteer jobs.  I kept going back to volunteermatch.com because they had more oportunities that didn’t require experience, a college degree, traveling to another country, or paying some membership fee.  I now volunteer at Feline Rescue.  It’s a no kill shelter for cats.  I have fun with the cats as I clean out their cages, swap out their litter boxes, feed them, and of course play with them.  One day I was cleaning the kitten room.  The kittens stopped what they were doing and watched me with curiousity.  One of them jumped on my back every time I bent over to pick something up.  There is another cat who takes hold of my hand in his paws whenever I pet him and he lightly, and playfully bites my hand.  He also licks my fingers.

I think the more activities I get involved in the less anxious I will be.  It’s a way to stay sane and keep busy.  My sister offered to pay for me to take a class.  That’s why when a Community Education Catolog came in the mail; I cirlcled a bunch of classes that I was interested in.  I decided on an acting class.  I start tomorrow. 

I’m finding some hobbies, getting involved in activities, and staying as busy as I can.  Someone once told me that life is like  chess.  You have to keep moving and use your resources wisely.  I agree with him.  That’s why I am solving my problems one square at a time.