Escape Ikea

I gazed at the little piece of junk that had no room for anymore books.
I told Leah I needed new bookshelves. For a moment we thought to ourselves.
After some discussion we didn’t know exactly to look for, but we had an idea.
We decided to go to Ikea.

Upon our arrival we were drawn in and seduced by furniture. Everywhere we looked we saw examples of perfection and the future. As we fought our way through the sofas and the beds; we saw displays that showed us what our homes would look like if we lived at Ikea. We looked at our watches and decided to stick to our original idea.

We found the bookshelves and picked a nice one. We thought we were done. We followed the arrows on the floor. We were led past more bedroom displays. I looked up at three dressers that tempted me like beautiful hoes. That reminded me; I also needed a new one of those. We found one that I liked. We knew we needed a shopping cart so, we hiked. We rode the escalator down to the first floor. We took a cart and went through an open door.

I pushed the cart as I followed Leah. She was running out of time so we couldn’t stray from our idea. We soon discovered it was almost impossible to escape Ikea. I followed her as she looked at cute little jars and knick-knacks. It was hard to turn the cart around and I bumped a couple of shelves, but it was only two gentle whacks.

What was Leah doing? Didn’t she say she was in a hurry? This is where things got harry. We weren’t the only shoppers. There were parents, babies, and teenyboppers. It was hard to get around other people. I lost sight of Leah. Oh great! Now I was getting anxious at Ikea.

I saw Leah, but getting to her would take me a while. The people in front of me were unaware of other shoppers. They stopped what they were doing and blocked the isle. I navigated the maze of Ikea. I slowly found my way back to Leah. We collected her items. Now it was time to get my items.

We wondered into a much bigger part of the store. We felt tiny when we realized we were in a giant warehouse. The smell of wood and saw dust confirmed that we were in a warehouse. We found my bookcase on a shelf in a long cardboard box. We needed help, but there was no man. Leah hatched a plan. I would hold the cart still while she reached for the box. Maybe we should’ve brought an ox. She maneuvered the box into the cart. It had been heavy. She needed to wait a minute and take a breather. Next, we moved on to the dresser. That was even heavier. We followed the same plan. We got this; man.

Now it was time to check out. It was a self service check out register. That meant it took us five minutes to figure out how to use it. Compared to the battle we just fought; this was only a little bit.

Now it was all over. We could make our exit. We could go back to the – oops! Where did we park the car? Oh no. That’s too far. I sat in the waiting area with the cart while Leah went for the car. I wondered how we would get these into the car. Again, I felt anxious. I looked around and wished this place had a bar. Leah returned with the car.

Leah popped the trunk and lowered the back seat. Getting these into the car wouldn’t be easy. We tried to make a plan while standing in the heat. We were stumped. We didn’t know what to do. That’s when an Ikea employee came to our rescue. He offered to help. He was tall and strong. Leah smiled and looked at him long. We watched him as he easily picked up the dresser and placed it neatly in the trunk. Next, he picked up the bookcase and laid it down on top of the dresser then slid it through the trunk into the back seat. We thanked him. He was off to rescue another damsel in distress. I closed the trunk. We climbed into the car and both sighed with relief as we finally escaped Ikea.